47: Are You Living a Subjugated Life?
- Gemma Gladstone
- April 7, 2022
Are You Living a Subjugated Life? Learn more on today’s episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!
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When we subjugate ourselves, we suppress our authenticity and aspects of who we are. In schema therapy, the self-sacrifice and subjugation schemas are called other-directed schemas. Those schemas appear similar in that they are both subjugating schemas, but there are some key differences.
We tend to suppress our needs when we want to care for others. We suppress our views and desires when we are afraid of getting hurt or angering someone. People-pleasers are always looking out for the other person and want to please someone if they feel guilty or scared of what that person might do.
Subjugation schemas, like all other schemas, are on a spectrum and a continuum. The good news is that subjugation schemas are treatable, workable, and malleable. So if we look at what is going on with those schemas, we can change them and avoid living a subjugated life.
In this episode, Gemma talks about schemas related to people-pleasing and gets into the subtle details of people-pleasing, subjugation, and self-sacrifice. She pulls those concepts apart and explains how they are related and what they mean. If you have a self-suppression of subjugation pattern in your life, stay tuned to find out what could be going on with you.
- Subjugation schemas are exhausting! They can take a toll on people physically, mentally, and emotionally.
- Why are people-pleasers not free to be themselves?
- People with subjugation schemas often experience life from a position of passivity- particularly if they surrender to their subjugation schema.
- Why do people with big subjugation schemas lack a sense of self?
- Self-sacrifice is a version of subjugation. Gemma discusses the self-sacrifice schema and explains where it could come from.
- Why do self-sacrificing people tend to be empathic and sensitive?
- Unlike self-sacrifice, subjugation is done to you. Gemma talks about subjugation, describes it as a schema, and discusses how it could come about.
- People with subjugation schemas tend to feel helpless and powerless and believe that others have more power than them- even when they do not.
- Unacknowledged and suppressed anger from subjugation schemas can result in various stress-related physical problems. Gemma explains how to get rid of that anger.
- If you do not change your situation or bad habits, you implicitly choose those things for yourself.