80. Talking to a Narcissist? Avoid These 6 Common Pitfalls
- Gemma Gladstone
- July 16, 2023
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Talking to a Narcissist? Avoid These 6 Common Pitfalls
Very often, if you were raised by a narcissist, in adulthood you will more or less fall into the trap of seeking the approval of people who are narcissistic.
A narcissist’s acceptance of you is often conditional – as long as you are the version of you they want to see, then they treat you well, or at least in an acceptable way.
In this episode Gemma discusses 6 relational or communications pitfalls to avoid when communicating with the difficult narcissist in your life.
These are people who are really difficult to deal with or communicate with, who might gaslight you or try to manipulate you, who might be highly defensive, super sensitive to criticism, self-absorbed/self-centred; have angry outbursts; tantrums; and tend to be blaming of others and sometimes can be – condensending; patronizing and belittling.
Avoid these mistakes:
1. Getting upset and highly emotional (instead stay calm)
2. Trying to get them to understand your perspective (this is a limitation & block for them…accept they will most likely never get it)
3. Expressing how you feel about something (eg, I find those comments very hurtful) . Unfortunately, these types of self-disclosures often irritate the narcissist and they may flip into further over-compensating behaviours
4. Asking permission for something in a self-subjugating way
5. Staying in the firing line.
6. Trying to get their approval / waiting for their approval / waiting for the praise that never comes.