The Tinder Swindler (Part 2) on today’s episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!
Go straight to THE RED FLAG PROJECT course for women
Visit our website THE GOOD MOOD CLINIC
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/The-Red-Flag-Project-103442091937249
Check out what’s new on our LEARNING HUB
For confidential information, counseling, and support service go to https://1800respect.org.au.
Ask us a question or suggest a topic by emailing: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.au
Today, we continue with our two-part series on the Netflix production, The Tinder Swindler.
In the first part, we spoke about the schemas and modes of the scammer in the movie. He is a con artist who meets women on Tinder and then persuades them to lend him vast sums of money.
In the second part, we focus on the women, or the victims, in The Tinder Swindler. We look at victim-blaming and unpack why people on social media tended to blame the women in the movie and we also discuss some other types of love scams exposed in the media, examine the findings of various social studies and experiments, and talk about cat-fishing- all of which are related.
Victim blaming has been going on in our society for a long time. Stay tuned to learn what it is and why it tends to happen.
Show highlights:
- Why are the women in the movie so viciously attacked by men and women alike on social media after the movie came out?
- What is victim-blaming?
- Some of the main reasons people are inclined to blame the victim of a crime.
- Gemma explains what the just-world hypothesis, or the just-world fallacy, is all about.
- Why do humans tend to trust others?
- Why the first woman in the movie, Pernilla, quickly becomes infatuated with the con artist and handed her money over to him.
- What is the truth default?
- Social media leads to social proof. That can lead to people being conned or taken advantage of.
- How do schemas and unmet needs put people at greater risk of becoming victims of scams or con artists?
- How do schemas lead people to abandon their boundaries and hang onto dubious relationships for too long?
- The schemas that make people vulnerable to being targeted by narcissistic individuals
- Some stories about women being love-scammed by manipulative men in the Australian series, Fake.
- Inconsistencies and regular absences are obvious red flags.
- Cat-fishing is no joke! Justine explains what it is and shares her experience of it.
- Some tips to help you avoid getting cat-fished ⚠️
Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!
Go straight to THE RED FLAG PROJECT course for women
Visit our website THE GOOD MOOD CLINIC
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/The-Red-Flag-Project-103442091937249
Check out what’s new on our LEARNING HUB
For confidential information, counseling, and support service go to https://1800respect.org.au.
Ask us a question or suggest a topic by emailing: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.au
Today, we are talking about red flags.
The Netflix movie, The Tinder Swindler, shows an extremely nasty example of an emotionally unavailable man. The movie is scary but riveting. It tells the story of a con man who persuades women he meets on Tinder to lend him large sums of money. Even though the character in the movie is an extreme version of what an emotionally unavailable man might be like, it helps to make things clear when we take his personality apart and scrutinize it from a schema perspective.
In this two-part series, we deconstruct the program of someone emotionally unavailable. In today’s episode, we dissect the personality of the con man in the movie from a schema perspective. In Part 2, we will take a closer look at the dynamics of what is going on with the women- or the victims. We will also break down and explain what happens psychologically with the victim-blaming and bitterness targeted towards those women.
Learning to recognize red flags early on will help you make better decisions when trying to find a partner or help you understand what might be going on with the person you are dating. Stay tuned for more!
Show highlights:
- Nowadays, con men and women have more means, resources, and avenues to exploit and manipulate people than ever before.
- The character in the movie quickly screens his victims and feeds into their idea of what love and romance should look like.
- We explain why the movie character probably has a narcissistic personality disorder and falls into the anti-social psychopathy spectrum.
- The movie character has a strong sense of self-importance and a massive ego.
- We discuss the various schema modes of the movie character.
- In schema therapy, anti-social traits get correlated with the psychopathy spectrum.
- What does the person in the conning and manipulative mode do to achieve their goals?
- Most people do not expect to come across anyone with a dominant mode to intentionally con and deceive others. Gemma shares a clue to look out for that would indicate that someone has that mode.
- When challenged, or called out, the movie character quickly switched from a charming to an angry and threatening mode.
- Although he had many red flags, the guy in the movie was adept at quickly building a sense of trust and intimacy with his victims.
- Why does it become harder for people to look at red flags rationally after being love-bombed?
- It is vital to trust your gut feelings if things do not add up or you feel confused.